THE CAT-EYE SUNGLASSES
Tiny sunglasses, worn on the bridge of the nose, are perhaps the most directional high-fashion look beloved of the Insta It Girls right now. Luckily for us normals, the likes of Erdem and Maison Margiela have inspired the high street to embrace some far more wearable cat-eye sunglasses too. The current crop of cat-eye shades, worn by the likes of Gigi Hadid, are slightly pointier of edge and smaller of lens than their classic counterparts. I feel more comfortable in these updated styles, yet I’m still not sure these statement sunnies are for me. They’re definitely wearable – but probably more suited to someone with a slicker style.
THE BUCKET HAT
The 1990s revival is here to stay, and the bucket hat is having its day in the sun. Michael Kors, Rosie Assoulin and Matthew Adams Dolan all put out versions of the Stone Roses-style classic, while Chanel’s transparent bucket hat is probably the headgear of the season. The bucket hat is ultra practical and easy to scrunch up into your bag or a pocket. But even I, having never met a functional trend I didn’t like, am unsure what to make of the one I try on. It’s not particularly unflattering but it doesn’t exactly scream ‘living my best life’ either. Perhaps I need to develop a more of a Liam Gallagher attitude, to make it look more ‘too cool for school’, and less, ‘Mum made me bring a hat to school’. It’s time to study the fashion history of Rihanna, who has been wearing bucket hats (and looking incredible, obvs) for years.
THE DAD TRAINER
This season your trainers need to be as big, chunky and ugly as possible. I try a ‘dad trainer’ from Asos and fall in love instantly. I feel tall, energetic and powerful in my supportive shoes – like I could jump over the garden fence in one leap, without spilling a pint. They’re so ginormous they almost make my legs look longer and thinner too, so, weirdly, they don’t look that inelegant. In white, these babies would go equally well with jeans, a floral dress, or even this season’s must-have pastel trouser suit.
THE TRANSPARENT BUMBAG
This see-through bumbag ticks two SS18 trends at once. Clear bags have been spotted at the likes of Helmut Lang and Valentino, while bumbags are back in non-ironic fashion. This number probably only looks good if you’re Generation Z. Even then, you probably need some Britpop ancestry or model genes to make it work. And while it’s probably helpful for security at a festival to see straight into my bag, elsewhere I’m not sure I need anyone to be able to gawp at my phone, crumpled receipts or grotty lipstick.